Yesterday (July 11), we celebrated the Memorial of Saint Benedict. Coincidentally, I just read a prayer attributed to Saint Benedict that was printed the Holy Hour, a meditative book published by Word on Fire that I use during Eucharistic Adoration at my parish. The author of the prayer pledges to do the Lord’s will in all things, and goes on to list the many ways he intends to honor the pledge.
Among those listed, he promises to honor all persons, and not to do to another what he would not want done to himself. Sitting in front of the Blessed Sacrament after I read this, I started thinking about how I treated a few people when I was a youth. Young people can be downright rude at times, and looking back, I realize I may have said some things that hurt my friends and fellow classmates.
I was never what would be considered a bully, but there were a couple of boys that I likely insulted because I didn’t particularly like them hanging around. Reflecting on this some sixty years later, I realize they could have been outcasts who were just looking for friendship and acceptance. The fact that I might have been rude to them haunts me now. I can remember once making fun of one boy’s weight. Another tried to befriend me and I basically ignored him.
I am reminded of the Movie of Your Life evangomercial put out by Catholics Come Home that depicts people watching moments of their lives being shown on a movie screen as we might envision happening on judgement day. The time will come when I have to relive those moments when I disrespected someone unjustly. Trying to right those wrongs today is impossible. Of the two individual incidents that I remember, one of my victims is no longer alive and the whereabouts of the other is unknown. I also wonder how many others I may have hurt that I don’t remember. I can only ask God for forgiveness now.
At the time, I did not realize or care that I was being hurtful. Now, at age 72, I have to ask myself if I am hurting anyone now. I speak poorly of others at times, not to their faces, but still say things that should be left unsaid. Is there anyone reaching out to me today that I am not responding to? Is there someone I know who needs my help, but I tend to avoid? Are my actions or inactions in accordance with the Lord’s will? These are all questions we should ask ourselves from time to time.
