When new converts come into the church, I always encourage them to get involved. It seems that people who are active in the parish are more likely to stay connected. But that got me to wondering how many would remain good Catholics if there was no social interaction at all. What if you came to Mass every Sunday and everyone ignored you? What if you were the only one present besides the priest? Would you still come to Mass? If the only thing keeping us coming to Mass is our horizontal relationships, are we coming for the wrong reasons?
Most of the excuses people use to avoid attending Mass are indefensible. Sunday Mass attendance should not take a backseat to anything. We should be there to worship God and receive Jesus in the Eucharist. Nothing else should matter. Bad homilies, lousy music, even bad liturgy should not keep us away. Maybe one might want to find a different parish, but as long as we have access to a valid Eucharist, nothing else should get in our way.
A friend from our parish told me of a woman who was received into the Catholic Church at another parish last Easter. Since then, she has changed parishes twice because she feels other parishioners were unfriendly toward her at the first parish, and rude to her at the second. This coming weekend, she is planning to attend our parish on a trial basis. I know nothing of her background before becoming Catholic, but I wonder if she was accustomed to non-denominational communities where social interaction is the norm.
I should think that independent churches where people choose to attend because they like the preacher or the services would have more camaraderie among members. It makes sense because they attend there because of similar interests and beliefs. They are more likely to see the same faces each week and would be quick to notice any new faces coming for the first time.
Catholic churches are different. Catholics can go to any Catholic church on Sunday and receive the same Eucharist, hear the same readings, and see some unfamiliar faces. We think nothing of it because travelers or visitors commonly stop in for Mass. Before Mass, we are focused on the Real Presence of Jesus in the tabernacle and preparing ourselves in prayer. One might enter the pew a few feet away from a parishioner friend and not even acknowledge that person. There should be no conversation that would distract others who might be praying. It is typically a quiet time that non-Catholics might mistake for being ignored or rudely treated.
OCIA leaders should address these differences for those who may be accustomed to a more social experience so they understand what to expect upon entering a Catholic church for the first time. They also need to realize they are encountering the real presence of Jesus in the tabernacle when they enter, and that He should have their undivided attention.
Too often we see Catholics drift away from the Church. Maybe they miss one weekend when on vacation or when a conflict arises. They start by skipping occasionally at first, and then more frequently. They think they are doing just fine without going to Mass and eventually stop going altogether. This is what happens when people lose their focus on the Real Presence of Jesus when they enter the church. They become indifferent. Once a person walks away, it makes it even harder to go back.
When I was going to Catholic school eons ago, the nuns told us it was a mortal sin to miss Mass on Sundays and Holy Days of Obligation. They said if we skip Mass to go fishing and get killed in an accident on the way home, we would go to hell. Were the nuns just trying to scare us? Not necessarily. If we die in a state of unforgiven willful mortal sin, we have severed our relationship with God and our salvation is jeopardized. Today we seem to be reluctant to make such a blunt statement. Would God really send us to hell for skipping Mass one Sunday? God doesn’t send us to hell; we send ourselves there by our disobedience. Yes, we can go to hell for committing a mortal sin.
The caveat here is the three conditions that must be present for a sin to be mortal. It must be grave matter, we must know it is grave matter, and we must do it deliberately. Does everyone who blows off Sunday Mass realize they are committing a mortal sin? They should. If not, whose fault is it? Is it their own fault for not taking Church teaching seriously, or is it the fault of those who were responsible for their faith formation? Did all my Catholic school classmates heed the nuns warning? No. Many of them drifted away later in life. Will they end up in hell? God will ultimately decide their culpability.
